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Thursday 8 May 2014

Absolute Worst People To Sit Next To On Public Transport

The “Let It All Hang Out” Person.

The "Let It All Hang Out" Person.
Less is more, my friend, less is more.

The Never-Ending Phone Conversation Person.

The Never-Ending Phone Conversation Person. 
It’s 7:30 a.m., you haven’t woke up yet. But the person next to you on the train is on her 14th phone call of the day, sorting out inconsequential middle management issues that affect no one in any meaningful earthly sense.

The Space Hogger.

The Space Hogger.
We all like to spread out. We all enjoy the freedom and thrill of taking up the space of two or even three seats. Public transport is the greatest example of humankind getting on, together. But this is just not on.

The Body Odour Man — sorry, it usually is a man.

The Body Odour Man — sorry, it usually is a man. 
There’s no polite way to say this: You smell.

 The Singer.

The Singer. 
As above, BUT WITH SINGING. Or humming. Which is almost worse

The Passive-Aggressive “Could You Just Move Down a Bit?” Person.

The Passive-Aggressive "Could You Just Move Down a Bit?" Person. 
No, I may not move down the carriage. There is no space in which to move. The train is packed full of other people, very few of whom are as annoying as you.

 The Public Display of Affection Couple.

The Public Display of Affection Couple. 
If people wanted to feel awkward around people exchanging hormones in public they could just never leave scho

All People on Every Night Bus, Ever.

All People on Every Night Bus, Ever.

The Sniffer.

The Sniffer. 
Unable to master the use of tissues, The Sniffer seeks to clear his of her nasal airway by snorting like a pig every five seconds. In extreme circumstances this person may sneeze on you, in which eventuality it is completely normal to jump out of the nearest window, regardless of your mode of transport.


The “I’ll Just Leave My Bag Right Here” Person.

Don’t make me ask you to move your bag. Don’t FORCE me to talk to a stranger on a train.

The Shoulder Sleeper

The Shoulder Sleeper.

The Chewing Gum with Mouth Open Person.

 The 24 Absolute Worst People To Sit Next To On Public Transport


 

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